You\u2019re so smart,\u201d gushes Heather\u2019s mother upon seeing her report card. \u201cLook at that Nathaniel. All A\u2019s! I\u2019m so proud of you honey. I told you she was the smartest kid in that school. Wait \u2019til I show that report card to Grandma.\u201d<\/p>\n
Heather\u2019s mother can hardly wait to get on the phone with grandma, put the bumper sticker on her car, and get together with the girls for a \u201cso how are the kids doing\u201d chat. Despite her need to tell the world about her \u201csmart\u201d little girl, she genuinely loves her daughter and has the best of intentions. Unfortunately, her high praise may have unintended consequences.<\/p>\n
Mother praised Heather for being so \u201csmart\u201d. She called her the \u201csmartest kid in the school\u201d and in the process told her how proud she was of her for being so smart. In other words, she was praised for her intelligence \u2013 as if she has been blessed with an extra large helping of \u201csmartness\u201d. Many people view intelligence as something we are dealt at birth. Some of us get better hands than others. From the looks of that report card, Heather was dealt a hand full of Aces.<\/p>\n
Although well intentioned, mother has inadvertently made her praise conditional. If Mom is so proud of her for getting straight A\u2019s, what will she feel about her if she comes up with something less? When her father says, \u201cThat\u2019s my girl\u201d, then whose girl is she when she brings home B\u2019s? Am I being too critical? There are many other ways for Heather to know her parents genuinely love her, unconditionally; right? But the risk here is that Heather is being labeled as \u201cspecial\u201d and may feel a need to hold on to that \u201cspecialness\u201d to retain her parents\u2019 approval and her own self-esteem.<\/p>\n
So what is the harm in telling a kid she is smart \u2013 when it is obvious she is? An important developmental theme has been ignored or violated. By focusing on how smart she is rather that how much effort she put forth, these parents have focused on a fixed trait as the source of her success \u2013 as if she possesses a certain amount of smarts. In other words, they are attributing the A\u2019s to this trait or a good brain she was born with. This view holds that intelligence is a set or fixed entity \u2013 not subject to change (or growth).<\/p>\n
The alternative developmental perspective, and the one I want you to consider, is the idea that intelligence is dynamic \u2013 it can change with effort. This view is supported by research that shows actual measurable brain growth that results from use \u2013 focused practice in particular. If we could do an autopsy (my apologies) on Itzhak Perlman, we would find his brain has significantly greater development associated with playing the violin and with the fingers on his left hand in particular. The same goes for your son\u2019s eye-hand (aka video game) coordination; Rafael Nadal\u2019s forehand; Gretzky\u2019s skating; or Emeril\u2019s cooking. This brain development is not just limited to physical activities. It also applies to reading, writing and math. Focused effort yields growth \u2013 measurable growth. In other words, it is possible to become smarter. Everyone can improve their current level of functioning with focused practice.<\/p>\n
So where does that leave Heather? What if her mother had said,\u201dWow, I know how hard you worked this year.\u201d or \u201cYou must be very proud of what you have accomplished.\u201d If Heather had in fact worked hard, then that effort deserves mother\u2019s praise. The goal of development is for kids to become internally disciplined or self-directed. Heather needs to know that growth is possible and it is under her control.<\/p>\n
By labeling her as \u201csmart\u201d and implying that is the basis for the straight A\u2019s was some fixed \u201csmartness\u201d, then what is Heather going to do when she moves on to high school where classes are more challenging and the peer competition is greater? What is she going to do when math concepts are more difficult to grasp and essays need deeper analysis? How is she going to respond to criticism, which can imply that maybe she is not so smart, yet is essential to making improvements and growing. If a child needs to hold on to the fixed label, then she may avoid challenges and potential failures. But that is a formula for stagnation. With a growth mindset, control is internal. She knows that her effort, focused practice which involves correcting errors and getting it right before moving on, is the source of growth and getting smarter.<\/p>\n
In an ideal setting, the report card would represent mastery of specific skills in each of those subject areas. We could look at that card and know that at Jefferson Middle School an A in math means that she has mastered factoring, solving for two unknowns, setting up proportions, \u2026; an A in PE means that she challenged herself daily with at least 20 min of aerobic exercise in her target heart rate zone; an A in English means that she can write an editorial that presents a logical argument, with three main points, that are clearly introduced, substantiated with evidence, and clearly summarized in the end; and so on \u2026<\/p>\n
The work of Carol Dweck and her students has demonstrated that by focusing on labels of intelligence (as if it is a fixed quality) in the long run can undermine a child\u2019s motivation and school performance. In contrast, praise for effort provides useful support for the essential means to growth (or getting \u201csmarter\u201d). See:<\/p>\n
Mueller, Claudia M. and Dweck, Carol S., Praise for Intelligence Can Undermine Children\u2019s Motivation and Performance, Personality and Social Psychology, 1998, Vol. 75, No. 1, 33-52, 0022-3514\/98\/S3.00<\/em><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":" Intelligence is not a fixed, unchangeable quality. It can grow with effort. Consequently, praise for being smart can undermine a child\u2019s motivation and performance. Instead, praise should focus on the effort a child has made, such as facing and overcoming challenges. Intelligence can grow with effort You\u2019re so smart,\u201d gushes Heather\u2019s mother upon seeing her […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[6,10],"tags":[109,31,45,108,110,48],"class_list":["post-816","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","category-big-ideas","category-parenting-framework","tag-brain-plasticity","tag-child-development","tag-fixed-vs-growth-mindset","tag-focused-practice","tag-intelligence","tag-natural-ability","entry"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.childproofingforadolescence.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/816","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.childproofingforadolescence.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.childproofingforadolescence.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.childproofingforadolescence.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.childproofingforadolescence.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=816"}],"version-history":[{"count":1,"href":"http:\/\/www.childproofingforadolescence.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/816\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":817,"href":"http:\/\/www.childproofingforadolescence.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/816\/revisions\/817"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.childproofingforadolescence.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=816"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.childproofingforadolescence.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=816"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.childproofingforadolescence.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=816"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}